little man's worries

It's been a long while since I last blogged about Renzo's growth, anyway he's been doing well, indeed extremely well and he's turning 5 in just another 4 months!! I seriously feel that he's growing up way too fast, but at the same time, I am glad to see him turning into a little gentleman day by day..

Just to side track a bit, a few days ago, I finally showed him this blog of his and let him read a post on his own. Since we first started this blog in April 2009, we have been discussing about when should we let Renzo know about the existence of a blog all about him, and the agreement is, maybe one day when we find him extremely rebellious, we should let him read and hopefully, he will understand how much efforts daddy and mummy have put in to cultivate him in the past. But he seems to have figured out there's a blog about Renzo as he's been mentioning "watch renzo grow on daddy's computer" often, so I decided to just let him take a look..

Anyway, so I said Renzo has been doing extremely well, I am referring to his self discipline indeed. We seldom bring him to "thinking corner" recently and he voluntarily helps to take care of his younger brother, and his pet "coconut"(a hamster he insisted to get recently) whenever necessary. He follows instructions most of the time, showers himself every night, spends time to complete his homework, and enjoys reading as before. Overall he's often in happy mood and seldom throws tantrums, even if he does once a while, it's not difficult to discipline him at all. So in general, he's bringing a lot more joys to us and no troubles at all, not in mummy's eyes at least.

Academically, we are still not forcing too much out of him. There's no enrichment classes for him at all, and his progress with piano isn't that good but we are still sending him to teacher's house once a week for 1.5 hours. At least he's not rejecting it but I am sure he needs a lot more practice on that. He completed his first spelling test at home without any preparation, it again proved the importance of mastering phonics skills. And he enjoys drawing just as before, but he's been drawing many more new staff, based on his memory of things he has seen before. Even for his Chinese, we have not been emphasizing much but he has already started learning hanyupinyin and basic Chinese words in K1. 

The only small concern I have, is that my little man seems to have a bit of worry, that bothers him pretty much lately.

Last night before we went to bed, he hugged me tightly and told me, "Mummy, I love you so much and I keep missing you everyday!" Then he started sobbing as he said he's scared of bad dreams. I told him immediately that I will protect him always but guess what he said? "Mummy, you must protect yourself also, I don't see anything you have to protect yourself, I am scared you are not with me one day.."

Gosh, I think the fear of death first came into my mind when I was 7 or 8 years old, and I totally didn't expect Renzo to have such questions and concerns at this age. I told him mummy's love will protect Renzo forever, and asked him to think about things he likes such as Angry Birds and Thomas Traiins, instead of those "bad things" before he sleeps. He asked me, "where is your LOVE then mummy?". When I told him it's the way I hug and kiss him, the way I think of him when he's missing me at the same time, the way I am being patient with him, the way I listen and understand his needs when he's not in good mood, and the way I try my best not to get angry with him no matter what he did, he finally showered me with that "YOU ARE MY EVERYTHING" SMILE!!