stress-free exam...

It is only natural to feel anxious when our kids are taking examinations. As parents, we often feel that the responsibility of children performing well in their exams partially lies with us.

Since Renzo entered Primary school last year, I've been going through revision with him before his term tests, just like most other parents do. I must say I'm really blessed that Renzo has never given me any frustrating moments or hair-pulling experience. He even told me that exam paper to him, is just a set of questions which he should already have answers to. I was pretty impressed with how calm and composed this little Primary 2 kid is. Of course slowly I figured out that he's probably just too innocent ignorant to understand how those test results will impact his life in the long run. Anyway I am glad he can remain the cool and chilled boy as he always is, even though the exam schedules can get pretty tight with his usual English spelling or Chinese tingxie coming at the same time.

Recently, this famous school Principal letter to parents  has taken the internet by storm. A friend of mine also shared that her girl's school principal advised parents during a parent-teacher-meeting session, that parents should refrain from reminding their children about upcoming test dates. As they have been reminded often by teachers in class, it's added stress to keep telling them about the same at home.

Interestingly, I do notice that compared to actual exams, Renzo has been performing better for his mock tests in the past, it has nothing to do with the difficulty level of the test papers because sometimes the mock tests can be even harder. And I do suspect that Renzo has unknowingly taken on certain level of pressure from my constant reminders before exams. So this term, I've decided to take a step back, since he's only in Primary 2 and there are plenty of chances to salvage his results, even if he fails his paper due to lack of preparation. We didn't even remind him on his test dates (we do have the dates pasted on the wall which he could easily refer to), let alone helping him with revision this term.

After the exam period was over, waiting for result became extremely torturing this time as we totally have no idea how he fares since we didn't prepare him before exams. He didn't do any revision either, but of course he followed his routine to complete his daily learning in the afternoon. We spent all our weekends during his exam period at Wild Wild Wet, I didn't feel like uploading our fun pictures on social media as all my other friends were sharing their tips (or at times struggles too) on how they prepare their kids for the upcoming term test.

End of the day, I was the one who stared in wide-eyed wonder at Renzo's SA1 results. Again, Renzo passed with flying colors, indeed his results for all sujects were better than what we expected. When being asked how did he manage to score well without any preparation before his tests by me, he answered, "I know, I just need to learn and practise everyday!", with the look of incomparable determination on his face!

The daily afternoon self learning routine we've instilled at home for Renzo seems to be working really well. Even on those days when I had to rush for work and forgot to leave any "smart work" aka assessment book for him, he would take his own initiative and work on a few pages for each subject. At the same time, he has plenty of play time when he gets to work on this Gundam models, Lego bricks or simply zone out in his cozy corner doing absolutely nothing!

I'm ending this post with a book I would like to recommend to all pupils, I believe this book helped Renzo tremendously in getting 12/12 for his English composition.

Will I be preparing Renzo for his term 3 papers? I guess not. I'm going to give him a stress-free exam period in hopes that he could perform his best again. But please don't get me wrong, not preparing him doesn't mean not caring about how he gets himself prepared. I will still be checking his school worksheets and as soon as I notice he needs help, I will step in and I will stay open minded about tuitions and enrichment lessons. He's never attended any as of now, but he might need it when things get tougher with one more subject added into his curriculum during upper primary.

helping Renzo with his Chinese...

Last week, Renzo had a Chinese mock test in school, which we were completely unaware of, and he wasn't prepared for it either but he aced his paper somehow. I wouldn't say we were very surprised at his result, because he did well for his Chinese during P1 anyway, although he always thinks Chinese is his weakest subject since it's a language he doesn't use at home.

We didn't send Renzo for any enrichment lessons although we are fully aware that he might have struggles with his Chinese in school. Instead, we made sure to make Chinese revision as higher priority and incorporate it into Renzo's daily routine after school.

I know you might have heard this a thousand times from Chinese teachers or your other friends with kids who absolutely hate learning Chinese, that in order to learn Chinese well, you need to use the language at home! Well I am not saying that's not right, but how many have seen significant improvement just by switching the primary language from English to Chinese at home? Personally I think learning Chinese involves a lot more efforts than just that, and there are many other good tips that actually help to reinforce what they've learned in school.

Tip #1 朗读课文
Reading aloud is the foundation for literacy development. While the sacrifices to read aloud are few, the benefits are many. I still remember when I was young, my dad always says he expects to hear 朗朗的读书声 from our room everyday when he's back from work. Kids get to hear their own voice when they read aloud, it helps to increase their attention span. Renzo is asked to read his textbook daily for at least 10 to 20 minutes. He always covers hanyupinyin with his hand because he's not supposed to rely on hanyupinyin to read since Primary 1 Term 3.

You might think their textbook is simple and getting them to read something out of the school syllabus is more useful. Well yes it definitely helps if they read a wide range of books. But when it comes to tests, most of the questions are actually based on their textbook, at least for lower primary.

Tip #2 掌握生字

The child who comes to school with a large vocabulary does better than the child who comes to school with little familiarity with words and a low vocabulary. Primary School kids all have this set of flashcards called 字宝宝, which they use occasionally during Chinese lessons. We bought another set for Renzo so that we could play with the cards before bedtime. Words which he could not read are left on the wall till he can recognize them. And we encourage him to form a sentence with the words each time, so he knows how to use them, not just how to read them.

At the back of their Chinese textbook, there's a list called 生字表, where they have all the 识读字 and 识写字 listed. You might find it simple but trust me, they need to master the list and you can't just rely on their weekly or bi-weekly 听写 in school, because most kids forget more than half of the words on their 听写 list, right after they've been tested. So make sure to go through the list and test your child on it regularly.

Tip #3 诗词背诵
Poetry recitation is literary work where ideas and feelings, accentuated with the use of distinctive style and rhythm is delivered through a public speaking activity with a focus on rhythm, alliteration some repetitions. Renzo doesn't have a strong foundation in Chinese, and we failed to expose him well in Chinese Poetry since young. So it is really tough work here, but for a start, I am getting him to copy Chinese Poetry only. It doesn't matter that he couldn't analyze or understand it, I just want him to slowly feel as if he's submerged himself in a hot spring, and experience the irrational joy or sadness in it.

Of course you can't really expect much result from poetry recitation as kids need a long period of time to accumulate such knowledge. But by the time they are in upper primary or secondary, they will benefit and composition will get easier for them.

Tip #4 勤做笔记
I've asked Renzo to note down all his mistakes from his past worksheets / test papers for all his subjects. But for Chinese, I am doing the job for now because I need to summarize the test questions and put things into different categories, which he's not sure about how to do it yet. I find it extremely important to understand the format of his test paper, so he could focus on the areas which he's not strong at.

For example, under the section 填写汉字, he's required to write the Chinese words based on hanyupinyin. Although he's tested on only 2 questions, it's harder than most other sections in my personal opinion because these are open ended questions, not multiple choices which he can even attempt to make a wild guess. And this is exactly why I said they need to master their 生字表 because if they can't remember how to write the word, they have no choice but to lose marks under this section.

And another example: 词语搭配. This is the section I go through with Renzo many times. Because in Chinese language, you can easily mix and match different words with similar meanings and that's where the confusion comes in. Renzo knows 认真写字 and 认真回答 are both acceptable, but he needs to choose 不敢回答 because he can only use one phrase once, and 认真 has already been used to pair with 写字in the sample given. He has to choose 不敢 to pair with 回答 as there isn't any other more appropriate phrase to pair with 回答. Okay I must say such questions aren't easy and they need to get exposed to a large pool of vocabulary in order to pair the words freely and comfortably.

Of course learning a language is not just about preparing our kids for their tests. Chinese language is one that is extremely profound, and we need to have the passion, to appreciate and embrace the culture in order to master it well.

Father Forgets that you are but my baby...

Thanks to my 4-5 hours sleep a day body, I find myself looking out the window from my seat, staring down at the clouds below while everyone else in my row were nodding away, deep in their sleep. My business flights on planes without in-flight entertainment (no thanks to Tiger Air) oftentimes gives me those moment of solitude outside of my house when I can quiet down and reflect on myself.

Just hours ago, I had picked up a book from the bookstore. It is the international best-seller, "How to Win Friends & Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. I used to own it about a decade ago, but gave it to a close colleague of mine as a farewell gift when our careers parted ways.

So here I was, rekindling the love I had for this book... perhaps the only book I voluntarily read from cover to cover more than once. Seventeen pages in... and already I was emotionally shaken by the book. It was a piece by W. Livingston Larned, which back then didn't mean much to me, but now, pens down my guilt.

---

FATHER FORGETS
W. Livingston Larned

---

Listen, son: I am saying this as you lie asleep, one little paw crumpled under your cheek and the blond curls stickily wet on your damp forehead. I have stolen into your room alone. Just a few minutes ago, as I sat reading my paper in the library, a stifling wave of remorse swept over me. Guilty I came to your bedside.

There are the things I was thinking, son: I had been cross to you. I scolded you as you were dressing for school because you gave your face merely a dab with a towel. I took you to task for not cleaning your shoes. I called out angrily when you threw some of your things on the floor.

At breakfast I found fault too. You spilled things. You gulped down your food. You put your elbows on the table. You spread butter too thick on your bread. And as you started off to play and I made for my train, you turned and waved a hand and called, " Goodbye, Daddy!" and I frowned, and said in reply, "Hold your shoulders back!"

Then it began all over again in the late afternoon. As I came up the road I spied you, down on your knees, playing marbles. There were holes in your stockings. I humiliated you before your boyfriends by marching you ahead of me to the house. Stockings were expensive-and if you had to buy them you would be more careful! Imagine that, son, from a father!

Do you remember, later, when I was reading in the library, how you came in timidly, with a sort of hurt look in your eyes? When I glanced up over my paper, impatient at the interruption, you hesitated at the door. "What it is you want?" I snapped. You said nothing, but ran across in one tempestuous plunge, and threw your arms around my neck and kissed me, and your small arms tightened with an affection that God had set blooming in your heart and which even neglect could not wither.

And then you were gone, pattering up the stairs. Well, son, it was shortly afterwards that my paper slipped from my hands and a terrible sickening fear came over me. What has habit been doing to me?

The habit of finding fault, of reprimanding-this was my reward to you for being a boy. It was not that I did not love you; it was that I expected too much of youth. I was measuring you by the yardstick of my own years.

And there was so much that was good and fine and true in your character. The little heart of you was as big as the dawn itself over the wide hills. This was shown by your spontaneous impulse to rush in and kiss me good night. Nothing else matters tonight, son. I have come to your bedside in the darkness, and I have knelt there, ashamed!

It is feeble atonement; I know you would not understand these things if I told them to you during your waking hours. But tomorrow I will be a real daddy! I will chum with you, and suffer when you suffer, and laugh when you laugh. I will bite my tongue when impatient words come. I will keep saying as if it were a ritual: "He is nothing but a boy-a little boy!"

I am afraid I have visualized you as a man. Yet as I see you now, son, crumpled and weary in your cot, I see that you are still a baby. Yesterday you were in your mother's arm, your head on her shoulder. I have asked too much, too much.

---

I am guilty for all the negatives pointed out and as Larned puts, I have been measuring Renzo by my yardstick, an adult standard. Renzo's youthful innocence and his ability to love me shows through in almost exactly how it is worded, with him creeping up to me after a lecture just to give me a great big hug both as an apology for not reaching my standard of him, and also as a relief to receive a hug back from me.

Have I forgotten that my proper manners were learned from mistakes?
Have I forgotten that my capacity for self control was acquired not long ago?
Have I forgotten that my independence was built up from failed experiences?

I focused my gaze back at the runway that we were fast approaching and decided to write this post before I headed for bed because although Daddy is a 2-hour flight away from you, Renzo, Daddy misses you and wishes for your forgiveness.

Remain the boy who's fits of laughter bellows down our halls and remain the boy who finds joys in the silliest of things, because then, and only then, can you learn about yourself and define your own yardstick, one which measures your life, not anyone else's.

Striking "Reading" off Renzo's list of things-to-master

As the final week of the year approaches, sitting here in my bedroom with the kids sound asleep in their's, the overwhelming feeling starts to creep onto me. The very fact that my Renzo is no longer the newbie primary school kid and is well on his way to the second year of his formal education (not to say kindergarten wasn't formal but heck, there weren't grading of the sort that gets anxiety levels up). Actions and reactions that were pardonable shall henceforth be dealt with more severely as my expectations of him being a responsible member of society increases.

But in any case, I can now consider myself a proud parent of a kiddo who has conquered a graded exam in what I might come to consider as flying colors, topped with a congratulatory letter signed off by our minister to encourage the little guy to strive and least maintain his level of academic competence.

Having said that, somehow or other, I must admit that Renzo should get most of the credit as he is really quite an independent learner. For example, just a couple hours ago (as of writing this post) while I was reading the biography of Jack Ma (it is a great read by the way), Renzo was beside me reading his "Dragonworld" fantasy book out aloud. Distracting as he was, it allowed me to listen in on his reading skills and when he masterfully deepen his voice, liken to a medieval story-monger, and regurgitate mythical terms like "Snaggle-Toothed Mountain" and "Glacier Caves of the Antarctic Snow Dragon"...my gosh, I could hardly believe this was the very same kid of mine whom just a few years back was all giggle-filled when whizzing and tooting to the likes of Thomas train and friends.

With a figurative warm tear of happiness rolling down my cheek, I can safely pat Mummy Chan's back and say,"With all the worries that comes with parenting, at least independent reading is one that we can strike off the list."

Now where on this long list is 'reading'... hmmmm....

5 tips to creating conducive learning environment at home..

Parents nowadays spend tons of money outside their child's school hours, at tutorial centers, enrichment classes and even indoor playhouses, they look at what different programs the place has to offer, how good the teachers are, how many sessions their child need to attend in order to show improvement, etc, etc. However, in the hustle and bustle of the hunt, parents often forget that the best place for their child to start learning is always - the home.

No doubt that teachers in school can teach both academic and social needs, but the home environment is most crucial to reinforce and retain the concept as children spend most time at home with their parents. With that in mind, it's no surprise that the number one favorite topic Daddy Chan and I share most often, is how to create a more conducive learning environment at home for the boys, and here are a few tips from us after much exploration and experiment.

1. Always have a routine
If you search the keyword "routine" or "timetable" on Renzo's blog, I guarantee it will return highest amount of posts, that's often I emphasize on it.  We foster routine by introducing a timetable since Renzo was a baby. Now that he's in Primary One and spends his every afternoon at home with helper, I can tell he's benefiting so much from a great routine. He memorizes his timetable by heart and can pretty much stick to it without much supervision. With a proper routine, it's easier for children to develop self discipline, which is key to developing great learning habit. We always tell Renzo, to have good self discipline now, he will enjoy more freedom in the future to choose the kind of lifestyle he enjoys. 

2. Set up the positive mood
A few months back, I read an article about how this mummy changed the family's habit of watching TV after dinner every night, into reading/playing together instead, simply by adding a "book wall'" in the living room. I shared that article with Daddy Chan and immediately he agreed to take some actions. Well it's not some major renovation in the house, but we do need to make a decision to let go our sofa in the living room, which means it's going to be rather inconvenient for guests. But I love what Daddy Chan said, we design our home based on our daily needs, we don't prepare our home for guest visits.  So, there goes our 3-years-old sofa, and here comes our new favorite piece of furniture in the house, a giant 2.3meter x 2.3meter IKEA bookshelf! To fill it up full is harder than we expected. I thought we have quite a substantial amount of book collection at home, considering we have 3 bookshelves before getting this huge one, one in each room. So after this small make over in living room, we still have the TV and the boys still watch their educational programs in living room as usual, however, they do spend more time reading, especially Rynus who didn't really show much interests in books in the past.

We also have flashcards wall in kids room, where we hang up flash cards and amazingly, a new set of card may stay on the wall for a few weeks, and without anyone noticing it, Rynus managed to pick up those words by himself. All he did was to stare at the cards, flip them from front to back, and back to front, again and again..

So that's what I meant by positive mood in their environment. You don't need to force them to learn, you just give them an environment that motivates them to learn. 

3. Make room for creativity
I was inspired by an online video to create this "weekly family wall calendar". Renzo has a timetable to follow on routine tasks daily, so I thought it's quite a cool idea to have this wall calendar which allows us to track our individual goals throughout the week. Nothing beats modeling behavior when comes to parenting so I really like that now the boys also get to see what Daddy and Mummy are up for. This also encourages Renzo to incorporate some of his creativity in artwork into his daily plans.

4. Make school activities relevant 
Finding a continuity between what kids learn in school and at home can help build the character of loving to learn. Renzo has a section of his bookshelf dedicated for any book that is relevant to school curriculum. We also display his test schedules and even his spelling list, so he knows when and how to get himself prepared at home.  Rynus is still young to map out his own plans for the day, but we still can use this wall calendar to track his major school events. He will have great sense of accomplishment seeing how "busy" his week is, just like his daddy, mummy, and elder brother's.

5. Change it up
Once a while, Daddy Chan and I will hold conversations about what need to be changed, or added to the boys' home environment, that can accelerate their intellectual development. Be it hanging up a new Multiplication table on the wall, or adding a new reading chair in study room, or a clearing away an old writing table that they've outgrown from. Changing up physical environment which they've been used to for some time already, gives them something new to look forward to and makes them excited to learn about other things.

Our next biggest challenge, is to provide them with separate study corners with minimum distractions by the time Rynus enters Primary School. Both Daddy Chan and I used to share study table with our own sibling and there's just too much distractions, I still remember telling myself I would study hard if I get my own table when I was young. So it's our priority to separate the boys once they both need a proper area to study. Yes we have slightly more than 2 years to work on that! 

In the end, the most important thing to remember in making the home conducive for learning is to let the love be visible and felt. A loving and supportive environment is what makes the home the best place to learn.

protecting kids from parents' negative emotion..

"Renzo, mummy felt really upset this morning because you didn't even bother to finish your breakfast on time, you know that we are rushing for school bus every morning, how can you take your own sweet time to eat while watching TV?! How did you feel when I didn't chat with you, wait for school bus with you, and wave at you when you got on the bus?!! I will probably feel sad for the whole day but I guess you don't even care..."

This was part of a message I left to Renzo on our daily communication book at home this morning.

Yes that's what I did after sending Renzo downstairs to take his school bus at 645am in the morning. I went back straight to the study room and wrote that message to him, so that he could read it when he's back from school around 2pm. I was feeling weary, crotchety, and sick to my stomach. The notebook was covered in scrawls and squiggles. For a second I paused and thought that pouring my negative emotion onto Renzo in such a way, potentially can ruin his day, but I couldn't care less, because my day was valready ruined by him!!

After taking a few minutes to recompose myself, I went straight with my morning routine - 20 minutes of Korean drama watching, yes I am a huge fan but I don't watch in front of kids, so usually I can squeeze out 20 minutes during breakfast to catch my favorite show. And guess what? 20 minutes later, I wrote another message to Renzo. And this time, I managed to tidy up my handwriting without me noticing that at all.

"Dear Renzo, mummy felt sorry for not chatting with you, not waiting for school bus with you, and not waving at you when you got on the bus. I LOVE YOU!! But please think about what made me feel and act that way? I do hope you can be more considerate and focused in the future, as you know we have to rush for school bus every morning..."

I thought I would be angry for the whole day and I blamed Renzo for that, but the actual fact is, I felt as if the whole world is on my side again after I've done something I enjoy doing. I realized I was so out of my mind 20 minutes ago, not because Renzo might have caused the bus driver to wait for him because he was too slow in finishing his breakfast, and in actual fact, his school bus only arrived about a minute later after we went downstairs, but probably, I was upset because I spent time and efforts to prepare his breakfast and he didn't even finish it, which made me feel less appreciated. But seriously, if he were to read the first message I left for him, how would he react? I might just demonstrated to him that it's alright to vent his anger on others by writing people a note.

We spent so much efforts each day, turning every unpleasant situation in life into learning opportunities for our children, in hopes that they would grow up with emotional intelligence to cope with different challenges in the world. But if we parents, are not careful about letting our emotions escape out for our kids to internalize, they will struggle to learn how to regulate their emotions and interact with others appropriately.

To end the story, Renzo hugged me and muttered "I am sorry Mummy" when I reached home at night after work. And I saw the notebook with his reply to my request on being more considerate and focused during breakfast, he wrote: "Yes I will do that (or at least I will try)",

After all, neither of us had the day ruined by our little episode in the morning.

Look beyond the school results..

If you are expecting to read my opinion about "academic result is not everything" after the recent news about changes to PSLE scoring and Secondary One postings, since Renzo and his peers will be the first batch to experience the change in 2021, let me just say, that's not the message I am trying to convey here.

As I mentioned in my post about our 1st PTM experience, Renzo has been doing well during first half of Primary One. It's week 4 of Term 3 now, we've already received a whole list of test information from the school and indeed, Renzo has already completed a Chinese Pick&Tell assessment last week.

Recently he mentioned to me that Chinese is getting a little tougher, which I fully agree because I think his pre-school has prepared him really well for the first half of Primary One, but now it's time for us parents to step in and guide him through the second half.

Nope I am not going to leave the learning part all to him although Renzo is a very independent learner so far, but what I need from him, is good learning attitude, coupled with effective learning method and habit, so for him to achieve best possible result.

Nope you are not reading this wrong, I know even the government leaders, and the education experts are telling us not to overemphasize on academic result, and it's 100% true that "exam result doesn't determine success in life", we parents should not neglect it is still an indication of their knowledge at one point in time, and poor result even at lower primary level, sends certain message, let me explain why I believe so:

1. It's only Primary School now, it's fine not to score well. 
NO! There needs to be a bottom line.
A friend recently told us that his 3 Primary school kids need to score 70 and above, to "earn" a family vacation overseas. For me, the expectation is 90 and above. Well you can say my expectation is very high. But for lower primary kids, their school curriculum isn't too difficult.  We shouldn't insist on 100 marks for every subject, we can allow them to make mistakes here and there, but anything lower than 90 marks, assuming they have normal IQ and are not suffering from any kind of learning difficulties, should raise the alarm, as that indicates there might be a problem with their learning method or habit.

Careless mistakes, not being able to recognize/read/write words, not paying attention during lessons, not being able to understand full question, etc, are all examples of not having the right learning method or habit. And these, should be corrected at younger age. 

2. As long as you try your best, your score isn't important.
NO! Kids have no concept about "try your best".
Renzo made 2 mistakes for his Maths paper last term. I asked him about how he feels, and I still remember his answer, "Mummy, I might not be the best, but I tried my best!". Trust me, I have no idea why he said so. Probably because he has teachers who encourage kids to try their best during exams. I personally do not believe in "try your best" philosophy for kids at this age. Well yes it's definitely the right way to encourage older kids in Secondary level, or at least upper primary level. But if I encourage Renzo this way, I think very likely he would only remember the "it doesn't matter what your score is" part, and forget about "try your best" part, or even if he could remember, likely he won't know how to quantify that, he probably doesn't even know in order to "try his best", he has to spend time in doing revisions. So how to expect good result?

Do parents really think by the time their kids are in upper primary school, they can score better by "trying their best" automatically, without laying a proper, strong foundation since lower primary days? I think the key is to set clearer, specific and reasonable goals for kids, and guide them in achieving those goals on a more regular basis.

3. Those who score well will become future scholars. 
NO! Scholars can definitely score well, but those who score well now might not be good at learning in the future. 
Even if your kid score 100/100 for all 3 subjects, there might be another 10-20 kids who get the same score in his/her class. Especially for lower primary, the gap isn't too big as the knowledge they are learning now is rather simple and easy to understand. What we should be focusing on, is whether our kids have adopted effective learning method that helps them to absorb the knowledge better, and whether our kids have formed great learning habit that allows them to develop the love and passion for learning.

And this is the very reason why those who did well in primary school might not necessarily get into a good University eventually. It's also why we often see a lot of "late bloomers" who only started to shine at later stage during their academic years. It all boils down to when a kid discovers the learning method that suits him/her the best, and continue the learning habit from there.

I was never once a top student during my school years in terms of academic results. But I've definitely picked up some great learning habits along the way which I still thank my parents for. Till date, I go for job interviews with a set of anticipated questions which I practised countless times. I always have a notebook and pen with me,  to fill up forms, jot down notes or even work on questions (sometimes there might be more complicated technical questions during the interview, where pen and paper come in handy). These, are habits I formed during early school years. It doesn't mean I will definitely score well in exams by doing so, but I definitely benefit a lot from it after entering into working world. Now that I'm on the other side of the table during interviews, I see many candidates who come for interview unprepared, but those who brings along pen and paper, often fits the bill eventually, which again proves your attitude determines your altitude..

Learning is a long term journey for kids, hence I can never agree that just because they are still young, it's only the beginning, we parents do not need to take their results too seriously. Look beyond their results, the process of guiding our kids to set specific and realistic learning goals,  building strong foundation, cultivating right attitude is what we should be working on right from day one.

why making food cute / fun for kids...

Recently I have a few friends who've been browsing through my facebook photos, asked me the same question, "How do you have the time to make cute breakfast for your son every morning?!". So yes, after Renzo entered Primary School since January 2016, I've been preparing his breakfast every morning and some time around the Lunar New Year period, I challenged myself to make cute "Monkey" breakfast to welcome the year of Monkey. Then I decided to get more adventurous and started to make his breakfast cute and fun. You can view all pictures on my instagram page @breadfastforkids

And here are the reasons why:

1. To give him a wonderful childhood memory
My mother isn't a breakfast person so I remember my dad being the one who wakes up early to prepare breakfast for us since young. My mother-in-law doesn't cook so Daddy Chan's breakfast is usually just 2 pieces of bread with jam. Well don't get me wrong, I am not complaining about anything and our parents are the greatest in our eyes! What I am trying to say is, I want to create this memory for the kids that although mummy needs to work and cannot be at home with them, I still try my best to cook for them whenever I can, after all, happiness is home made when comes to food, at least that's how I feel. Now when I ask Renzo about what makes him love mummy, one of the things he would definitely mention, is that Mummy makes yummy food, especially cute breakfast for him!

 

2. To allow that extra 10-20 minutes of sleep
Nope of course I am not referring to myself, I need to wake up 30 minutes earlier every morning just to prepare Renzo's breakfast. But that allows Renzo to sleep in for an extra 10-20 minutes at least. His school bus comes at 645am and I usually wake him up by 620am, so he has maximum 15 minutes to finish his breakfast. Parents I know of mostly complain about how hard it is to get their kids ready during their morning routine. And Renzo being a rather slow boy in doing everything, will probably take 30 minutes to finish his breakfast, if I do not serve him something that can perk him up instantaneously.  By giving him a "wake up surprise", usually he gets excited and more awake to bolt down his food very quickly.

3. To make up for not being able to make lunch bento
I started off by packing his lunchbox for recess, but after a week, he told me he prefers to buy food at the canteen, which is definitely a great news because everyone knows that packing food is really not easy. Especially if I want something better looking, all the cute stuff I put inside his lunchbox usually cannot survive till recess. So I told myself to make those cute stuff for breakfast instead, which is indeed a lot easier as I do not need to worry about him getting an "angry bird pizza" without eyes, or a "Olaf" egg that looks like "Baymax" in a frozen themed bento.

4. To get him appreciate life more
Yes this is like a bonus point which I didn't expect initially. Our morning chat during breakfast gets more and more interesting nowadays when Renzo started guessing about what ingredients are being used for making the character. And once in a while he would make little twists here and there.
He once turned a plain pancake into a "cookie".

He once turned a Donald duck into a "rooster".

He enjoyed making burger for himself and Daddy.

He borrowed a cooking book from library to try out different recipes.

"自己的生活如此苟且，孩子怎么会有诗和远方的田野. 一个没有幸福感的母亲，怎么会培养出有幸福感的孩子。漫漫人生路，若是没有一颗快乐心，那孩子的未来会成个什么样！一个阳光快乐的妈妈，就是一座鸟语花香的天堂。谁也没有资格，在孩子心里种下灰色的种子"
I believe providing him with nice food is a way to demonstrate my attitude towards life in front of him.  So that he understands with a little bit more efforts, we can turn simple bread and butter into something beautiful and lively. Although it's tiring, we can do it as long as we are willing to. That's the way to cultivate resilience and perseverance in children. I do wish he could get influenced by my positive vibes and apply that to his daily life too, so he will always strive to perfect his work and life.

And, just a few tips to share with those mummies who might be interested to try:
1. If you want to make something elaborate and intricate like these:

You need at least 30 - 60 minutes, nope I am not kidding but cutting Nori (seaweed) can get harder than expected if you want certain kind of result that even stencils can't help to achieve (eg, Elsa's eyebrow). So I would say it's not worth the efforts especially if you are new in making cute bentos. By the time you are done, food are usually cold.

2. Nicer looking food = more healthy. Sad yes but that's just the truth. I already avoided processed meat like sausage and ham, even Nutella is banned although it's one of the best ingredient for making easy and quick bento, and kids would sure love it but nope, after reading about how unhealthy it is, I stopped buying it completely.

I made these toast arts for one week, and some of them, like the Captain Jake and Ice Cream cone, were made with food coloring. Seeing the colors being added into food, is quite... gross.. I totally do not want to make them once again, unless I am willing to source for natural food dye options using fruits and vegetables.

3. The easiest ingredient to work with in my humble opinion, are white bread, breakfast buns, seaweed, hard boiled eggs and fruits. Quick ones take about 10 minutes so it's not hard to make, the hardest part is to think about what to make, often I tell myself to repeat my menu especially when my creativity as running thin at time. So when I started with Disney Tsim Tsim theme, it kept me inspired for a good 3 weeks easily.

Will I continue when school re-opens in another week time? Of course, why not?!